R.A.Koyama

Live Well, Live Happy, Live Long

Category: aging (page 3 of 3)

aging is defined differently by different people.

Aging shouldn’t stop you – Take The Step Your future awaits-

 

I am sure many of you have heard the phrase – Take the step the bridge will be there.

It was an inspirational phrase used to help people accomplish things they thought they never could or would.

Well to me that phrase has two purposes, the first was to write about aging, and the seconded was to encourage others to live their lives to the fullest no matter what their age.

So that is why I am encouraging you to TAKE THE STEP no matter how unclear it appears.

 

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No matter where we are on life’s journey, we need to do things that we consider beyond our capability. If we do not continue to push ourselves, we could soon find ourselves being pushed by others.

That is the reason for my first book  about Staying Home written to help us acknowledge what and how we need to prepare ourselves and homes to fit our needs as we age.  For many people, the concept of having to do so is something they do not want to accept.

This is where the phrase becomes helpful.  By taking the step, you are walking across a bridge that will support you as you age.

By not taking the step you are ignoring the future and what it holds.  Make no mistake there is a future, what your future will be is for the most part up to you.

That is why I encourage my readers and my friends to take whatever steps they can to secure the future they want,  not the one others will impose upon them when they refuse to take the step.

So if you haven’t read the book let me give you a few of the key steps the book will help you take.

  • How to stay mobile
  • Managing Your Memory
  • Taking Care of Your Hearing
  • Recognize the importance of Attitude
  • Taking Stock of your Living Environment

These are just a few of the areas covered in the book.

 

One of the things that I want to say and that I often tell friends who didn’t consider the above to be some they need to review;

IF YOU CAN”T BE SAFE – YOU CAN’T BE HOME!

So why do I say that?  Well, the truth of the matter is if anyone in your family, community or health support system feels that you are not are safe living in the manner you do, they will be the first to insist that you need to live in an “assisted living facility” for you own safety.

That is something I and I am sure many of the people I know do not want to have happen.

So READ THE BOOK, it will help you take the step to walking on the bridge of your choosing, not someone else.

Cleaning House

Not what you might think but as I write my next book it provides insight into the topic. Who would have thought there is so much to write about getting old. The most important part of it is the learning. Writing these books has taught me there is so much more to consider along the way, and the best part of all is knowing it is not all bad.

My upcoming book is another of those self-help kinda books that talk about what to do with all the stuff we have gathered in our lives.
As it happens all that stuff is not always ours, but we do seem to collect things that we somehow just can’t manage to let go of.

One would think that will all to talk, and even magazines that show how the next generation are into the minimalist look that we too would hop on the bandwagon about aspire to be that ourselves. Well, according to what I see in my friends and family it ain’t’ happening. Sure each one of us thinking about what a good idea it is and how good it would be no only for us but the environment as well. But even those that live in the tiny condos now being sold just cant’ seem to get down to living with the minimum.

As we get older so does the stuff we gather, and I would bet you that half of it is also gathering dust. I remember the days when everything my parents had was constantly used from dishes to bedding, towels and face clothes. Heck, we didn’t even have a linen closet because there was nothing to put in one. And when it came to pots and pans, there was no need for a special drawer or cupboard because what we used was already on the stove.

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Nowadays there are cupboards for dishes an pots and pans, more than what we use or need. Most kitchens have pantries in one form or another, and they are filled with stuff that is rarely used or eaten before there is something in need of shelfroom that is there. There are drawers for dish towels, a closet for towels and more shelves for bedding. I would also suggest that it hasn’t changed much even after our kids leave home. We have developed a “just in case” mentality that really should be reined in as we get older.

So back to the point of the book. The truth of the matter is that as we get older the less inclined, we are even to think about all that stuff. The issue comes when something untoward happens, and someone now needs to get rid of this stuff. Similar to my book The Hardest Conversation, getting rid of our stuff becomes a touchy subject, especially when someone else suggests the need for us to do so.

Hard Conversations

senior sail to the future

I have written about my current book project titled the Hardest Conversation and think that I should explain that it really speaks to helping aging parents live the best rest of their lives. This book is not about a parent in decline.

The reason this is the hardest conversation is because your parent(s) may/will be very much engaged with life when it takes place. Those parent(s) that are active, and energetic often do not consider the conversation relevant. It is diffcult at times even for ourselves to think about what we need to do or be aware of as we age. To my mind it doesn’t matter if your parents are 60 or 80 when you have this conversation, it is one that needs to take place. When you read the topics covered in the conversation you will see why I think that it will help you (if you are the adult child) realize that this is a discussion we all need to consider as we get older.

The time may come when each of us has to face the final conversation, but for now I think a focus to a bright and enjoyable future is more appropriate. Once this has been addressed no doubt there will be need for that book, but that is in the future. I truly believe that a happy today, pleasant dreams and goals for the future can make this conversation stay quite aways in the future.

Do you know what your Temperament is?

No matter what stage of life you are in never stop learning.

No matter what stage of life you are in never stop learning.

Do you know the temperament of your parents, other aging family members or even your own?  My new book on “The Hardest Conversation” reveals that is could be critical when having these difficult conversations.  I wish I had taken that into consideration when my brother was making some of the decisions he made.  If I had known how to address his personality and temperament, I might have been able to help him change his mind about some of them.

That’s not maligning any of the choices people make it simply pointing out that when we have certain information we may active differently.  Along with the book, “The Hardest Conversation”, I am writing a short ebook that describes some of the different temperaments, how they change as we age and some of the conflict they can cause.

Just because we are aging doesn’t mean that we are incapable of learning or changing things to make our lives better.

 

You will find that theme throughout most of what I write, be it a tweet, a facebook, blog post or a book.

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