R.A.Koyama

Live Well, Live Happy, Live Long

Tag: aging concepts

Aging conjures up thought of Leavings

 

Death is not the end when you consider what you are leaving behind

 

 

Wistful Sky

Wistful Sky

Most of us consider dying as the end and true it is the end of our lives, but it isn’t the END. The vast majority of us leave something behind. That leavings may be family, friends or some other legacy. Sure we think about leaving something behind in the form of insurance.

Just watch TV for a while, and you will no doubt see ads showing families talking how they feel so sorry for the other family who was having a hard time paying for their loved one’s funeral. The message is you need to have insurance; that is what you leave behind and if you don’t then your death is not the end but the start of a financial struggle for those you left behind. And I think it is true, that each of us at a minimum has the responsibility to have enough insurance to cover whatever bills and costs are left when we go.

 

But that is not all there is to dying.

 

Sure dying isn’t good for any of us. But the only person that death is the end for is YOU. Once you’re gone, you’re gone, end of the story – For YOU.

 

What we leave behind can be good or bad, I want to focus on the good.

I believe we live at the most wonderful time ever!  There is so much we can leave behind that will be wonderful and most of all make people happier than we could ever have done at any other time in our lives.  Of course, when we go, there is the immediate feeling of sadness, but after the initial pain, there is so much we can leave them with that can help them get over it sooner.

 

So for those of us who have not lived in isolation, our death is not the end. We have family, and friends to whom our death means more than just us being gone. I believe we can do more to lessen the effect of our death and to make our death something that helps them in their life more fully. I am not speaking of tangible things. We all leave things behind, what I am talking about is our essence. What is the essence of ourselves that we leave behind?

 

I am reminded of my granddaughter and even my children who always had this blanket or stuffy toy they could not go sleep without.  I remember their panic if it could not be found.  And I also recall their answer when asked why they need it so much, why wouldn’t another stuffy or blanket do?  The answer was; it smelledLike you or Mommy or like home, and that was what helped them calm down or go to sleep.

 

 

sleeping child

 

What we leave behind is the topic of my next book  titled Leavings, you can get a feel for the content by reading a recent post on the topic by clicking here  LEAVINGS’

Well, when it is our time to go to sleep what will we leave with them to go to sleep?   I know for our kids now in their 40’s their most trusted soothers have now gone.  The blanket at one point disintegrated in the wash.  That stuffy has lost all of its’ inners and the outer somewhere along the way.  So what will they have to soothe them, and make no mistake no matter how old they get they will need something of us to help them through life.

 

How much do you think about what you will leave behind?

When we are in our 50’s unless we have had some serious illness or someone close to us has died, I would guess there is no thought given to what will be left behind when you are gone.

When we reach our 60’s our thoughts turn to our life and possible death. But beyond the tangible, we need to leave how much consideration do we give to what of US we will leave behind.

 

So I ask you when that final door closes what of YOU will you to leave behind?

 

Be sure to stay tuned for LEAVINGS

 

In the meantime, you might want to pick up the latest book titled Clean Your House Before You Go.

 

Aging shouldn’t stop you – Take The Step Your future awaits-

 

I am sure many of you have heard the phrase – Take the step the bridge will be there.

It was an inspirational phrase used to help people accomplish things they thought they never could or would.

Well to me that phrase has two purposes, the first was to write about aging, and the seconded was to encourage others to live their lives to the fullest no matter what their age.

So that is why I am encouraging you to TAKE THE STEP no matter how unclear it appears.

 

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No matter where we are on life’s journey, we need to do things that we consider beyond our capability. If we do not continue to push ourselves, we could soon find ourselves being pushed by others.

That is the reason for my first book  about Staying Home written to help us acknowledge what and how we need to prepare ourselves and homes to fit our needs as we age.  For many people, the concept of having to do so is something they do not want to accept.

This is where the phrase becomes helpful.  By taking the step, you are walking across a bridge that will support you as you age.

By not taking the step you are ignoring the future and what it holds.  Make no mistake there is a future, what your future will be is for the most part up to you.

That is why I encourage my readers and my friends to take whatever steps they can to secure the future they want,  not the one others will impose upon them when they refuse to take the step.

So if you haven’t read the book let me give you a few of the key steps the book will help you take.

  • How to stay mobile
  • Managing Your Memory
  • Taking Care of Your Hearing
  • Recognize the importance of Attitude
  • Taking Stock of your Living Environment

These are just a few of the areas covered in the book.

 

One of the things that I want to say and that I often tell friends who didn’t consider the above to be some they need to review;

IF YOU CAN”T BE SAFE – YOU CAN’T BE HOME!

So why do I say that?  Well, the truth of the matter is if anyone in your family, community or health support system feels that you are not are safe living in the manner you do, they will be the first to insist that you need to live in an “assisted living facility” for you own safety.

That is something I and I am sure many of the people I know do not want to have happen.

So READ THE BOOK, it will help you take the step to walking on the bridge of your choosing, not someone else.

Are you wondering about Aging in Place

Aging in Place is the current term for getting old at home.  But, if you were to do a search online you won’t find much that will actually give you any idea how to do that. Sure, there are Doctors, nurses and resource sites all over the web.  The problem is they don’t provide you with any concrete guidelines that will prepare you for aging at home.  That what my newly revised book intends to fix. It is a roadmap, a how to, or what to do if you in fact do want to age at home.
 

I just finished having it edited and while I am putting the finishing touches on it why don’t you take a look at the new cover for AGING SAFELY AT HOME, NOT IN A HOME  and let me know what you think of it.  In the next post, I will share the table comments and you can let me know if you think I have missed something you want to know.

Many people have written about “aging gracefully”, being a senior myself I am more concerned about “aging safely” and that is why it is the title of my new book. If we are safe and allowed to do so at home, then it is much easier to accept age and doing so gracefully.

 

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